Review of the best according to the editorial board. About selection criteria. This material is subjective and does not constitute advertising and does not serve as a purchase guide. Before buying, you need to consult with a specialist.
Becoming a parent faces many challenges. The main one is raising a child. When there is no one to ask wise advice in order to decide how to act in a given situation, the methods developed by experienced psychologists come to the rescue. We offer our readers a selection of books that, in the opinion of the editors, deserve special attention, since they really teach you to understand your child and communicate with him correctly.
Our experts have prepared a rating that includes the 13 best books on raising children of different ages.
- Rating of the best parenting books
- 'From Diapers to First Dates', Debra Haffner
- How Children Succeed by Paul Tuff
- 'It's Late After Three', Masaru Ibuku
- Tigress Mother Battle Hymn by Amy Chua
- 'A Quick Start Guide to Raising Toddlers' by Axel Hake
- 'French Children Don't Spit Food' by Pamela Druckerman
- 'Harmful Parents', Susan Forward, Craig Buck
- 'Secret support. Affection in the life of a child ', Lyudmila Petranovskaya
- 'An independent child, or how to become a “lazy mother”', Anna Bykova
- 'Communicate with the child. How? ', Julia Gippenreiter
- 'Brothers and sisters. How to help your children live together ', Adele Faber, Elaine Mazlish
- 'Before Your Kid Drives You Crazy' by Nigel Latta
- 'Make Our Children Happy', Madeleine Denis
Rating of the best parenting books
|Nomination||a place||Name of product||price|
|Rating of the best parenting books||1||'From Diapers to First Dates', Debra Haffner||RUB 518|
|2||How Children Succeed by Paul Tuff||149 r|
|3||'It's Late After Three', Masaru Ibuku||396 r|
|4||Tigress Mother Battle Hymn by Amy Chua||383 r|
|5||'A Quick Start Guide to Raising Toddlers' by Axel Hake||494 r|
|6||'French Children Don't Spit Food' by Pamela Druckerman||RUB 539|
|7||'Harmful Parents', Susan Forward, Craig Buck||RUB 560|
|8||'Secret support. Affection in the life of a child ', Lyudmila Petranovskaya||376 r|
|9||'An independent child, or how to become a “lazy mother”', Anna Bykova||278 r|
|10||'Communicate with the child. How? ', Julia Gippenreiter||396 r|
|11||'Brothers and sisters. How to help your children live together ', Adele Faber, Elaine Mazlish||358 RUB|
|12||'Before Your Kid Drives You Crazy' by Nigel Latta||533 r|
|13||'Make Our Children Happy', Madeleine Denis||RUB 540|
'From Diapers to First Dates', Debra Haffner
Leading the book is Debra Haffner, an American sex education specialist. Few adults are able to start a frank conversation with their child about sensitive topics. But sooner or later you will have to step over shyness and fear, especially at the moment when the child enters a difficult adolescence. First feelings, dates, parties with peers, kissing, late returns home – this alarms and worries adults, so they do everything possible to prevent children from getting into trouble. True, many choose inappropriate methods, trying to ban and speak from a position of strength. The conflicts that arise push the child into risky actions, including sexual experiments.
Debra Haffner highlights the key points that parents should be interested in first. Explains how to communicate your own values about sexuality so that children want to hear. The author does not ignore the psychophysiological features of development, distinguishing three categories: junior, middle and senior. Describes in detail how the thinking about sex changes in each of these periods. The topics of masturbation, harassment, contraception, pregnancy, sexual orientation, etc. are also covered.
The book is replete with examples taken from practice, as well as personal experience. Suitable for all parents, especially those who are raising teenagers.
How Children Succeed by Paul Tuff
The second line goes to the work of Paul Tuff. Readers will see the myth breaking down that high exam scores are required to be successful. The author claims that personal qualities, character, for example, endurance, perseverance, self-discipline, motivation, purposefulness, ambition, and curiosity play a significant role in this difficult process. In order for the child to be able to achieve heights in the future, it is recommended to focus on the formation and development of these qualities.
On the pages of the book, the reader is introduced to contemporary educators and researchers who use scientific tools to study children's character. As an example, there are numerous stories of children who have now become successful people. Tuff explains the relationship of parenting given to adult outcomes. Paul explains what parents can do to prepare their baby for an independent future; analyzes situations showing who and how copes with it, and who makes mistakes.
The work is full of names and research numbers, which is very informative. The book makes you think and look at a child's education from a different angle. Recommended for parents of schoolchildren and those who are just going to first grade.
'It's Late After Three', Masaru Ibuku
The third position is occupied by work devoted to the upbringing of a baby at the earliest period, from birth to three years. Masaru Ibuka claims that during these years it is necessary to develop as many abilities as possible. The book is written with a minimum amount of water, as readers note in reviews and reviews. The pages contain many practical techniques that allow you to intellectually develop a child. The author focuses on the fact that you cannot set yourself the task of growing a genius, it is better to approach the process in a playful way, let the baby rest and have fun with peers.
The material is divided into blocks, so the information is easily perceived. The presentation is accessible and simple. There are many examples from life that allow you to focus on the main thing. The book is colorful, filled with funny illustrations that will cheer you up. Recommended reading for everyone who plans to become parents in the near future or have recently become parents. It will be especially interesting for beginners, but people who want to deeply study the topic will not like it, since the main theses are on the surface and do not have full disclosure.
Tigress Mother Battle Hymn by Amy Chua
In fourth place is the work that made a splash in the USA and Europe. A professor at Yale School of Law described in the book her experiences with raising daughters. Amy Chua amazed the readership with revelations about the Chinese parenting model. The above methods shocked someone, but admired someone. Discussions do not subside to this day.
Amy recounts in detail how she raised her two girls, preparing them for a successful future. She deliberately did everything to make her daughters musical geniuses. As a Chinese woman who married a Jew and lived in the United States, the woman did not deviate from national traditions. Although they seem wild, effective results have been obtained. Amy built her system on several prohibitions, here are some of them: spending the night with friends; inviting friends to your place; participation in school plays (whining about the ban); watching TV and playing computer games; independent choice of optional disciplines; grades below fives (applied to all subjects, except physical education); refusal to study music; classes on other instruments, except for violin and grand piano.
Readers have different opinions. Not every mother wants and can become such a 'tigress'. We recommend this material for acquaintance to parents raising children with a musical bias.
'A Quick Start Guide to Raising Toddlers' by Axel Hake
The fifth becomes the book, despite the title is not a guide. The work is full of jokes and short stories-articles, which at one time were published in a German newspaper. They tell the story of a family with three small children. The journalist-father shares his successes and failures in upbringing, talks about the future, in a humorous form describing various life situations.
The book is useful to all parents, as it makes it possible to humorously approach everything that children sometimes throw out. This is not serious psychological work, but light reading at your leisure. After getting acquainted, you will look differently at whims, hooliganism, leprosy and resentment, and also learn to exhale in order to continue the difficult path of education with calm nerves. Axel does not give any advice, does not develop author's methods, but simply talks about his experience, full of both successes and failures.
The main message of the book is parental love. As stated in one quote, any gentleman who reads the 'A Quick Guide to Raising Babies' will be comforted, as he will understand that not everything is so bad with his children, because everything is exactly the same with others. Suitable not only for parents, but also for adolescents who still remember their restless childhood.
'French Children Don't Spit Food' by Pamela Druckerman
The sixth line is received by the bestseller, which tells that the baby should live every age stage naturally, without interference from the outside. Pamela lived in France for many years, so she managed to study the traditions of upbringing, combining gentleness and severity, freedom and prohibitions. All her books are becoming popular and beloved among parents.
The book tells how the French manage to bring up happy, obedient and polite children, without sacrificing their own lives. They do not spend midnight near the baby's bed trying to rock him, babies do not throw up scandals in stores, do not interfere in adult conversations, calmly accept refusals, eat adult meals and behave in restaurants. The author insists that social life, career and appearance should not fade into the background after the arrival of a child in the family. She shows this by the example of French women who always manage to remain fashionable, sexy and active.
The work is written with humor, so it will give not only practical advice, but also entertain at your leisure. The book is recommended to a wide readership.
'Harmful Parents', Susan Forward, Craig Buck
The seventh position is occupied by a deep psychological book from two authors. The main message of the work is that you must not let parents go wrong behavior that causes serious harm to the child's psyche. Yes, they are also people who can make mistakes, but deliberate manipulation of authority, guilt and other things kills the baby's self-esteem, his confidence in himself and his strength.
The material talks about how to work with victims of any violence (psychological, sexual, emotional), as well as with parents, whether or not they consciously practice such behavior in relation to their children. The book helps adults understand how to behave correctly without showing abuse. Often, such parents themselves were victims in the family, so it is impossible to get away from the prevailing stereotypes. Sadly, but many who grew up in alcoholic families, and decided that they would never repeat a similar fate, sooner or later return to a vicious circle, for example, choosing a partner with similar problems. This book also contains a lot of information on the sensitive topic of incest: it explains how to get started with diagnostics and therapy, as well as exercises that you can do on your own and with a specialist. The work of Susan and Craig makes it clear that a child has the right not only to physical, but also to emotional protection, where personal boundaries, feelings, opinions, and self-dignity are respected.
Recommended for reading for all future and current parents, as well as for people who want to cope with the pain of childhood.
'Secret support. Affection in the life of a child ', Lyudmila Petranovskaya
In eighth place is the work of the famous psychologist, Lyudmila Petranovskaya. She has written several works, including articles on growing up. It's not just about growing up a toddler, but all of us who have gone through a shake-up. Post-Soviet upbringing, collective trauma received and still experienced. Being at the junction of two worlds, it is already impermissible to blindly follow the rules instilled in us since childhood.
The book is considered basic by Petranovskaya, therefore it is obligatory to read. Here we will talk about difficult children and finding an approach to them, about the inextricable connection between adults and babies, about attachment. Lyudmila says that it is necessary to build mutual love, but in such a way that in the future it does not become a heavy burden and burden. Only mutual understanding will provide the most simple communication with the child. The book contains answers to the most popular and difficult questions: Should teenagers be given freedom? Should I send my child to kindergarten? etc.
The work is written in an accessible language, and the convenient division into chapters by age allows you to navigate faster. Recommended for reading for all parents, teachers, psychologists, as well as people who want to reconsider relationships with already grown children.
'An independent child, or how to become a “lazy mother”', Anna Bykova
The ninth is the work of Anna Bykova, who once posted her article entitled 'Why I am a lazy mother' on one of the sites. It talked about why overprotection is harmful, why give the baby more independence. The article immediately attracted attention, after which it was decided to make a whole book on this topic. Later, Bykova published a number of books.
The author's advice will direct moms on the right path, allowing them to soberly assess their approach to parenting. Anna explains that the desire to always be irreplaceable and unique for a child is a path to nowhere. Numerous reviews and reviews emphasize that the book is written in a language that is simple for ordinary people, so anyone, even not versed in psychology, will be able to endure something useful for themselves. A large number of practical examples will clearly demonstrate what the psychologist is talking about.
The book answers a variety of questions: how to potty train? teach your baby to fall asleep in the crib by himself? instill neatness so that the child himself removes toys? other. Suitable for a wide readership.
'Communicate with the child. How? ', Julia Gippenreiter
The tenth line goes to the work of Gippenreiter, whose books have become bestsellers for ten years. The author teaches how to communicate with the child correctly, paying attention even to the little things, for example, to casually thrown phrases like 'Oh, who do you look like?', 'What did you think!' etc. The psychologist gives a clear explanation of how such words are dangerous and how they are perceived by children, that they bring humiliation and devaluation of problems. Julia offers a unique technique that will help parents to establish communication with a child at any age.
Even if the baby is surrounded by care and attention, without proper communication, he is simply unable to develop fully. Over time, this will surely affect his behavior, after which mom and dad, throwing up their hands, will say that he has become disobedient and unbearable. In fact, the whole root is that adults did not establish the correct relationship in time, because the result obtained is only their handiwork. The book helps to develop a healthy style of communication that will have a positive impact on the future of the child.
The work of a psychologist for many readers is a guide to education. It is better to get to know him at a very early stage, when the baby is very young or has not yet been born, but even if you have just learned about the book, we still recommend buying it. She will help families where there are problems with grown children, even if they are already teenagers.
'Brothers and sisters. How to help your children live together ', Adele Faber, Elaine Mazlish
The eleventh position is occupied by the work of Faber and Mazlish, which tells about the correct building of relationships between brothers and sisters. After the success of the previous book, psychologists were inundated with requests to do a separate work on this issue, since parents do not know how to protect children from quarrels, rivalry and jealousy, so that no one feels left out.
The book written in an accessible language will first of all explain how to teach kids to express negativity, so as not to hurt the environment; avoid enmity and come to a compromise ourselves; to be an individual without comparing yourself to anyone. Although the work does not carry revolutionary methods, but repeats simple truths, for many it has become a lifesaver, according to the reviews. The clearly presented material, both in the form of text and in the form of illustrations, reminds mums and dads what mistakes cannot be made in order to keep peace between brothers and sisters.
Not everyone will like the book, as it has a slight western bias, but the essence and basic ideas are applicable in our country. Suitable for parents with two or more children.
'Before Your Kid Drives You Crazy' by Nigel Latta
In twelfth place is a book by a practicing psychologist, which tells about how to learn to understand your child; accustom him to restraint, without depriving him of carelessness. The work is full of tips that will help already desperate parents who are tired of whims and disobedience. It touches upon the stages of development of preschoolers, and also provides recommendations to help develop the correct attitude to any behavior on the part of the baby.
Nigel presents the material with humor, but in a structured way so that the reader does not miss the point. The author does not touch upon questions about feelings between a parent and a child, but gives practical advice on how to act in a particular situation, most often a dead end. The proposed techniques may seem harsh and inhumane, but they are not. Raising a capricious, sometimes uncontrollable child is the most difficult task that requires a special approach. The book does not offer physical punishment, but it ignores bad behavior and encourages good behavior.
Work is suitable for moms and dads of unbalanced, spoiled and aggressive children. Remember that each child requires an individual approach, so you cannot use all the methods without correlating them with the individual.
'Make Our Children Happy', Madeleine Denis
The rating closes with a series of books, which includes five works, after reading which, it will turn out to raise a happy person. Recommended for reading by all parents, especially those who are just planning to have children.
'Your Child's Dream' will tell parents how to train their toddler to fall asleep on their own; will tell you how to overcome the night fears of a child. Lots of tips and tricks will allow you not to sit for a long time near the crib every night. 'Whims and Tantrums' will tell you about effective methods that allow parents to figure out where the baby's anger comes from and how to deal with it. Here is an analysis of the situations that occur most often. Different age periods are taken, so at the right time you will already be prepared and will be able to react correctly. 'Preschoolers. 3-6 Years' is a collaboration between Clever and Psychologies magazine to help parents better understand children's behavior and guide their child by setting age-appropriate goals. 'Elementary School. 6-10 years' – continuation of the project. On the pages of psychologists share their views on the practical side of education. 'Teenagers. 11-16 years' – the end of a family project. The book helps to establish a dialogue with a teenage child, overcome alienation, avoid aggression and resentment, and also accept growing up as a natural factor.
Attention! This rating is subjective and does not constitute advertising and does not serve as a purchase guide. Before buying, you need to consult with a specialist.